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Born As One and Cruel Seperations
Nightmarish Tears, Human World Nightmares take their hold on us. And our fears bring forth our desires and realities torn away from us. Some dream of dying... some dream of others dying... some dream of losing their possessions... and the coldest nightmare is that one dreams of a solid darkness; leaving you empty, with no desires or fears. Trully; this is the worst nightmare. To sleep was a blessing. His mind was nothing but a blank slate, a void of eternal peace. He never wanted to wake up - it was far too comforting. The darkness enveloped him in its warmth, soothing his mind with ignorance. To think was a curse; he would think about the day of life he would waste when he awoke, toil hard, and then fall to sleep again - such a trivial task. He knew, however, that sooner or later, he would have to open those eyes, for his body would not let him fall into such a deep slumber. It was one of the many curses he had as a "human"... He felt his heart pulsate in his chest once more, and his nerves slowly come to life. Groggily, he opened his eyes up, not seeing anything at first. He grunted, vision hazy as he raised his hands to level with his head. Sliding on his stomach, he used his hands to grip the ground underneath him and push himself up-- Wait a minute. Ground? His eyes widened immediately, and he shot up like a light, blinking several times. All he saw was red, and he was beginning to think that he had somehow been blinded. But, as his vision came into focus, he could see the environment clearly. A bead of sweat dropped down his face, and he whipped around several times, horror going through his body. One moment, he had been sleeping soundly on a bed, with comrades all around him doing the same. And the next... ...he was in an apocolypse. To his disgust, he had been sleeping on what were the remains of a man, torn apart and decomposing to the bones. All around him, there were several others, hundreds of corpses lying about. There seemed to be no end to them, coming in various forms; men...women...and children. Surprisingly, he could not pick out any Hollow masks in the area. Panic overwhelming him, he allowed for his voice to echo throughout the sea of death. "HELLO?!" Silence. Nothing but the soft winds blowing - a mockery to the trauma that was steadily growing within him. "HELLO?!" His voice was getting desperate, pleading for anyone to come to his aid. His body began shaking, and he started making whimpering noises, hugging himself despite the fact that it was warm. He didn't want to be alone.... he didn't want to be alone with all of these... things! Aimlessly, he wandered, stepping over the decaying and mutilated corpses with the gait of a zombie. He repeatedly called out the same command, over and over, as if someone would come and wash the bodies away... Where was his comrades... Where was his mother.... Where was anyone-- He stopped... because he was seeing what he never should have. Nnoitra. Ggio. Hermosa. Melina. Menoly. Loly. All of them were lying against each other, their eyes blank, and their respective weapons in their hands. They were the only ones who had seemed to remain intact. However, blood that stained their clothing, as well as tears and showing wounds on their bodies, made Senkaku come to the horrifying realization. His lips trembled, and he couldn't even bring himself to say a thing. Instead, he fell to his hands and knees, sobbing quietly to himself. No words were needed to be said... for they were being repeatedly voiced into his head. "You failed them." "You decieved them." "Worthless...." "Pointless...." "WEAK!!" "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" He let out a raw scream to the sky... ...and then his eyes snapped open. It was all gone. Instead, he was now at the same place he had been before his drift to slumber. Only now, he was panting, sweat beading down his face. He held it in his palms, trying to steady his shaking nerves and body. Oh god.... he needed a breather.... disregarding what anyone would say if they awoke and saw him, he crawled out of his sleeping bed and staggered out of the area in which they were in. Loly and Menoly had laid asleep; but something was amiss. Loly could hear a noise around the campsite. Her ears perked at noise occuring. Slowly her gaze drifted open and she stared upward and around. Senkaku is missing... her voice and mind too tired to speak yet, she could track where he was going... it wasn't usual for him to just leave. Pondering, Loly slowly stood up, making sure to keep quiet, she decided to follow Senkaku, but she was already a few minutes behind wherever he was. His head was spinning violently. He could barely walk straight. And yet, he was making it. His bare feet slapped the ground as he continued to stagger aimlessly, a wild look in his eyes, and a confused curl of the mouth. As he walked, his eyes started to drift. He was passing by several structures of the ruined city, making it through several structures that had long ago fallen. A fallen teddy bear there... a lost ring there... it was the signs of a civilization that had fallen, whether due to war, or simple natural disasters. And yet, even as he walked past them, his heart was tightening more and more. You see, there was no remnants of the past in his vision - it was already being sighted out in his mind. Once again, he could see those corpses-- Oh, god... Please no... Desperate to shake off the memories, he took caution to the wind and started to run, his breathing becoming erratic. He felt so sick to his stomach... what was happening...?! "Wonder why he's got up..." she began to kick her pace into action; wherever Sen was going, it might be to chase after someone, seeing as his signature picked up it's pace and the foot steps were notably staggering, maybe he was hit? Thinking of the bad in mind, she ran into a sprint. ....did he hear footsteps?! In his right sense of mind, he would've known quite easily that it was an ally's. However, in the confused and panicked state that his mind was now drowning in, he didn't even recognize it in the slightest way. Was it real?! Was it a part of those fucking voices?! Oh, god he was going insane! He kept running blindly, everything around him becoming a blur. Where in the hell was he going?! Why was he even going anywhere?! All he was trying to do was get away from-- However, he skidded to a stop. What he had come face to face with was the moon of the dark-lit night. In his running, he had finally reached the outskirts of the city, where the earth was now clear and barren. Nothing but grass and patches of the earthen plains had greeted him. His stricken eyes only saw the frightful red... in the sky... staining the ground as much as the corpses around his feet were! He staggered once again, taking in gasping breaths. Sweat fell down his face, and his motor functions were deteriorating... something was quelling within his stomach-- He couldn't hold it in anymore. Falling to his hands and knees, he felt the disgusting bile build up within his throat... and vomited right then and there. His stomach was just about ready to split open in the heaving, contracting viciously to squeeze every bit of the vulgar material from his body. Four times he did this, and four times he felt like nothing more than complete shit. When he was finished, he pushed himself away and onto his side, lying there in the dirt... Failure... He raised his hands to his face, tears spilling from his eyes. A failure for a leader. A failure for a friend. He had failed to protect Hermosa all those years ago... he had failed to stop Ggio from being hurt by the vengeful Nnoitra... and most importantly, he had failed to retrain Melina when she had critically injured Menoly... he wasn't worthy of leading his team anymore. He sobbed silently right then and there, seemingly being the only individual there. Even if one did see him cry, he didn't care. He couldn't deny it any longer. He would fail his team again... and they would die because of his stupid mistakes.